Sadhguru looks at how a child needs a friend, not a boss. If we enforce our ideas upon a child, he will lose his sense of independence, and this could result in rebelliousness later on. Once you become a parent, the most important thing is that you have to be 100% straight. You just have to protect them from the wrong influences, the rest let them free, he says. At the same time, they should remain free from your influence, he points out.
Questioner: Pranam Sadhguru. One of the tasks that we are given and trying to do it is to raise the… taking care of the kid… taking care of your children at home, but we are troubled with we… whenever we to make a decision or not to make a decision get troubled with like what to consider or what not to consider. Can you give us some perspective about something that we should think while making a decision or not making a decision for the kids?
Sadhguru: Why are you making all the decisions for them?
Questioner: (Laughs) That’s the trouble. I am sure that I am not the right person to make the decision, but should that be made or not like what do I do when I need to do something?
Sadhguru: Hmm? First thing, we need to understand is children only come through you, they don’t come from you. They are not your property to be conducted whichever way you feel fit. No, they are not. If you treat them as your property or your future investment – if you treat them as such, you are committing a certain sacrilege against Creation and the Creator for which there will be a price. Simply it’ll come in the form of life or maybe it’ll come in the form of your children – the price. Yes, it’ll be very unfortunate to see that. I am saying this – a very cruel thing to say to any parent, but I am saying this because it’s a very cruel thing to parent a child. The child doesn’t need that, but please see in so many ways, you’re doing everything possible to see that he remains dependent on you in some way or the other. You are not thinking of liberating him.
So, the moment you start working, you want your children to be attached to you, isn’t it? Well, you yourself open Bhagavat Gita and read and say ‘You should not be attached, you should not be attached’, you tell your wife ‘See don’t be attached to me so that you don’t ask me when I don’t come home.’ (Laughter) But your children, you want them attached to you. So before you choose to have children, you must think about these things but if already it’s happened, now… at least now you must think about it properly, seriously. One thing is if you want to produce something little better than yourself to the world, hmm? It’s important? If you produce a child, it must be at least one step better than you, isn’t it? If the same nonsense is going to happen once again, what’s the point?
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Yogi, mystic and visionary, Sadhguru is a spiritual master with a difference. An arresting blend of profundity and pragmatism, his life and work serves as a reminder that yoga is a contemporary science, vitally relevant to our times.
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